Friday, August 28, 2009
8 years
Almost every other day of the year, when I remember her, I can just be happy and think of the good memories. But once a year, on this day, I indulge myself and allow myself to really miss her. To think about what it would be like to have her around, what she would think of me, how much she would enjoy my children. I think the worse part is that it now feels so normal to not have her around. The first year, when the grief was still fresh, her absence was felt so acutely. So much time has past now, however, that it is all just a distant memory to have her around day to day. It is healthy to move past that part of the grieving process, but I feel like I lost something when I moved on. She was such a beautiful, gentle woman, although imperfect (who isn't though?) and I am thankful that she was my mother.
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4 comments:
Love you, Erin! I still include her in my list of people I pray for who have passed on. :)
I am sure she would be, and IS, proud of the woman and mother you have become, in no small part due to the guidance she provided in your life, and that part of her will live on in you for years to come. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family today.
if it helps, it doesn't seem so long at times. I sympathize as your mourn your mourning time. Like Elizabeth said, she is still with you and proud of you. It's ok to cry for her, even on days after today. I was thinking about how hard it might have been for Jesus to leave this world and his Mother...but of the great joy when He brought her into His Kingdom and crowned her as His Mother and Queen. That joy will be yours and hers one day too when you are reunited again.
What a beautiful post. Thank you for teaching me a little more about your mother and the relationship you had with her. I am sure the things I love about your came from her. Your gentleness, your patient and open ear and your loyal and encouraging friendship.
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