
I have a husband who is my best friend, my highschool sweetheart and who I am still crazy in love with after almost 15 years together. We have babies... five beautiful, stubborn, imaginative, strong-willed little ones who challenge my wits and sanity every day. I am a lover of God, of birth, of life, of the forest and mountains, of wheat fields. I create things with yarn, needles, my heart and my hands. I am me.
Thursday, October 27, 2011
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Porgie Georgie
I may have said the nursery rhyme to the baby a couple of times and now Adelle has taken to calling him Porgie Georgie. I love her. And him. There is too much cuteness in this house.
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
A post four years in the making
In October 2007, I taught Issy to knit. She has slowly, every few months since then, worked on knitting a rectangle, which would eventually become this purse:
Monday, October 17, 2011
A glimpse of our school year
We started school a couple of weeks ago. It hasn't been toooo bad. George actually isn't the big challenge. It is keeping Adelle occupied/not making a mess that requires some doing. Some days are better than others in this regard. Luckily, she has been taking pretty good naps lately so we have been doing most of the things that require one on one time during that time. It makes me think back to our early homeschooling days when Liam was her age. And then that kind of makes me feel like time goes by too quickly.
We are using Mater Amabilis curriculum as our base this year. My sister Michelle used it last year and spoke highly of it, so I thought I would give it a try. Isaac is pretty much Level 1B and Issy is 1A but we have adjusted some things so that Issy, Isaac and Liam can do them together.
Liam is doing Teach Your Child to Read and Issy and Isaac are doing Explode the Code Online for phonics. Issy and Isaac are also doing Primary Language Lessons for grammar this year.
The kids are all doing the Faith and Life series together. Issy is using the New Catholic Picture Bible for Bible History and Isaac and Liam are using it for New Testament. Issy is using the Life of Our Lord for Children for her New Testament.
We are using This Country of Ours for American History. Interesting book. Think I might need some more sources to have a balanced look at the beginning of our country, but so far, it seems like a good overview.
Continuing with Math-U-See this year. Issy told me she is liking math more than she did last year. And my boys are pretty darn enthusiastic about it. I wish I could guarantee that they would always have kind of enthusiasm for math.
We are using Mater Amabilis curriculum as our base this year. My sister Michelle used it last year and spoke highly of it, so I thought I would give it a try. Isaac is pretty much Level 1B and Issy is 1A but we have adjusted some things so that Issy, Isaac and Liam can do them together.
Liam is doing Teach Your Child to Read and Issy and Isaac are doing Explode the Code Online for phonics. Issy and Isaac are also doing Primary Language Lessons for grammar this year.
The kids are all doing the Faith and Life series together. Issy is using the New Catholic Picture Bible for Bible History and Isaac and Liam are using it for New Testament. Issy is using the Life of Our Lord for Children for her New Testament.
We are using This Country of Ours for American History. Interesting book. Think I might need some more sources to have a balanced look at the beginning of our country, but so far, it seems like a good overview.
Continuing with Math-U-See this year. Issy told me she is liking math more than she did last year. And my boys are pretty darn enthusiastic about it. I wish I could guarantee that they would always have kind of enthusiasm for math.Tuesday, October 11, 2011
A month later... some reflections



Sweet, sweet boy. I Love him so much. All those long days of waiting seem pretty far away now.
I am really glad he is here. I was reading back over my posts from this pregnancy. I feel very, very fortunate that our best case scenario seems to have played out. He had the milder of the two antigens, and this was my first pregnancy sensitized to that one. He looked great, anemia-wise, the whole pregnancy. The fluid thing seemed to have resolved itself. He came a wee bit early for me.
I was so pleased with my care this time. Other than my the whacked out billing issues with their office (which I am hoping to get resolved this week), both of my doctors were really great to work with. I was really surprised how much I ended up liking the perinatologist. He was very understanding of my desire to be cautious and yet to keep things low-key if possible. He was encouraging of my choice to vbac and understood that it was important to me to go into labor on my own as long as things kept looking well. I felt very much like an equal partner in my care. I don't recall once being talked down to. My previous experiences and knowledge of my body were given weight in making decisions.
My experience with birthing in the hospital was overwhelmingly positive, also. Even Grouchy Nurse and Pushy Resident didn't really bother me. I felt so surrounded by Joe's and my support team's good... um, energy? supportiveness? (I am not sure the right, non-hippieish word I am looking for) that any negativity just bounced off me. I felt protected but I also felt the strength to advocate for myself. This was really important to me and something I had been concerned about. I got there at just the right time- not so early that I was messed with excessively and not so late that pushing out the baby was a chaotic experience. I was so pleased that everyone was really respectful of that time immediately postpartum, which happens so rarely. It was like everyone in the room really got it.
Oh, I could go on with my reflections about the birth and likely will in another post. But for now, I hear a little boy squeaking himself awake and 4 other littles that need to be directed to get ready for the day.
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Life with a babe...
This is my fifth baby- you would think that very little would surprise me at this point. And yet, new motherhood has always held something different for me. My babies have all had different personalities, the way the other kids interact with a new sibling is different, how I am able to respond to all of them has been different. I would like to say that this transition has been smooth, and I guess if I was comparing all of them, it definitely hasn't been the toughest.
George is not particularly easygoing. He really doesn't like to be put down when he sleeps, save a bit of a stretch in the afternoon when he will sleep for a while in the swing. He doesn't sleep very well at night- there is usually a stretch from 3 or 4 a.m. till about 6:30 when he doesn't really want to nurse, but he does want to suck. Just not on a pacifier. And he can't coordinate his fingers yet. So he just grunts and squeaks and latches on and off every 15 or 20 minutes. And when he is awake during the day, he kind of mostly just wants to nurse.But he is really, really, cute. And the kids love him.
I have also been able to respond to his lack of easygoingnesss relatively well, at least this far. Aside from having to do it a somewhat overwhelming amount, nursing is going very well, which is always a good thing. And I also have the experience to know that, in the grand scheme of George's life, this time is short. I am trying to find that balance between wanting to get this really intense time over and done with and knowing how short the newborn days are and how I should savor them.
Thursday, September 29, 2011
George's story...
Wow. I can't believe we made it.
What a journey this little boy's pregnancy and birth have been. And, of course, it doesn't really start with him- you can read about Adelle's birth and his other sibling's entrances into this world in this post.
I really wasn't expecting that positive pregnancy test last January. At first, I was worried, not only about the pregnancy part, but also about being mother-of-five. And even though the last few weeks have been rough at times, I think he is fitting nicely into the family. We are going to do just fine as a family of seven.
If you have been keeping up with my blog, you know all about the pregnancy this time- the baby being positive for the little c antigen, the testing, my desperate hope that he would come just a week or two early so that I could know he was ok and so that he wouldn't give the doctors any cause for concern.
I started having sporadic prelabor contractions at about 35 weeks. There were several that were strong enough to make me a teensy bit concerned about my ability to handle the impending labor and birth... they were pretty strong.
Shortly after my 37 week appointment, I started having contractions in the evening that were regular (about 10 minutes apart) but then peter out when I went to bed. He would move a lot during this time, also, so I can only guess that he was just trying to get situated in a good position. In my head, I understood that this was just prodromal labor, but, being an overthinker, I tried not to drive myself crazy about whether this was it or, if it wasn't it, if it would happen soon. I was 3+ cm dilated and 75% effaced at 38 weeks and my OB joked that he probably would see me before my next appointment and I told him I would expect to make it till then and we could just be pleasantly surprised if we saw each other before then. The baby was measuring about 7lbs 12oz at that appointment, according to ultrasound, and my fundus was measuring spot on.
Things Begin.
The Saturday after my appointment, a friend had offered to baby-sit for us so we could go on one last date before the baby came. We took the kids over to her house and headed out to dinner at Panera. It was just lovely- I joked that the baby was waiting to come until the weather cooled off. We walked around some shops- I agreed to walk around the electronics store in exchange for walking around the craft store with Joe. George was so low and big, it was really more of a waddle then a walk. We had to stop by Joe's parents house to get a pan for Labor Day brunch on Monday. While we were there, the cool front finally, finally came through, bringing some rain and much needed relief from the summer of insanely hot temperatures.
We drove back to Mary's house to get the kids, windows rolled down bringing in the cool, rain-scented air. Sweet time.
Got the littles home and put them in bed. Late enough that they didn't even get up after we put them down. We opened the windows, turned on some Norah Jones, sat on the couch and chatted. It was one of the conversations that you can set the stage for but not force. I love those kinds of conversations- I can hardly remember what we said but I remember feeling connected.
Contractions woke me up at 2:30 that Sunday morning- every ten minutes, couldn't sleep through them. I was making noise to get through them and I wanted Joe to sleep, so I went out to the couch, turned on the music I had put together for the birth and did my thing. Then at 6:00 a.m. they just stopped. I was baffled but kind of too tired to care at that point, so I went to sleep for a while. I think I got up around 7:30 and went into the bedroom, where Adelle was sleeping with Joe and I crawled into bed with them for a bit before she woke up. I would have them sporadically, but nothing regular.
We got ready for Church, went to Mass with the kiddos, had a few while we were there, but they weren't real strong. Upon arriving home, as I was getting Adelle out of her carseat, I had a strong one and they picked back up again. Had them regularly during lunch. I needed a nap since I had been up with them for several hours and they petered out while I slept.
It was so beautiful since the cool weather rolled through that after naptime we decided to go to our local nature center and take a walk with the kids. We took a path that I hadn't ever taken before and it ended up leading out to a main road almost 2 miles from our car. It was one of those things that could have made me really grouchy, but choose to laugh through it instead. I had lots of contractions while we were on our walk. Ha! To have been one of the cars on those main roads that afternoon and see the very largely pregnant woman, leaned over her husband, four other children in tow. My poor pelvis felt like it might fall apart when we were in sight of the car. It makes a good part of the story though, right?
We got home and I made dinner for the kids while Joe went and picked up some Chinese food for him and I. By that time, the contractions had gotten stronger and more regular again (about every ten minutes). Joe started timing them when he got back. They increased to about every 6 minutes and I thought that this was it. I called my niece who was coming to the birth and told her to head back to town (she was at the lake for Labor Day weekend). I wanted to get the kids to bed because I was certain they would increase once the kids were.
Only, they didn't. After the kids were in bed, they slowed down to about ten minutes apart again. I tried to use the breast pump to see if they would increase, and they did while I was pumping, but then spaced out again. I took this to mean that it just wasn't time and although I was disappointed, it was getting to be about bedtime and I was tired. I figured that if it wasn't going to happen, at least I should get some rest.
I dreamed about having contractions that night (so I was probably having them and just sleeping through them, I would guess) but slept relatively well. Joe was off of work for Labor Day, so it was great to have him home. As I took a shower that morning, I tried to shake off my disappointment. I thought about this blog post I wrote in March and decided to continue to focus on transformation.
We went to Joe's parents house for a Labor Day brunch. It was a gorgeous day- we sat on their back deck, warm sunshine, cool breeze. Good company, great food. Even though I was disappointed not to have had the baby, it was a really lovely morning. I had contractions on and off throughout the day, but nothing noteworthy.
I got to nap again that afternoon and we had some delicious potato soup for supper. I started having contractions around dinnertime, but I tried to ignore them and pretend I wasn't having them. We got the kids to bed and Joe went out with his brother. I took a bath and watched Glee on the laptop. While I was in the bathtub, I couldn't help but notice that they were about ten minutes apart. But they had an edge to them they didn't have before. I made a mental note of this but chalked it up to overthinking and moved on. I also remember thinking, perhaps a tad overdramatically, that my contractions were never going to be more than ten minutes apart.
Joe got home around ten and I decided to go to bed and left him reading on the couch. I remember standing in the kitchen right before I went and commenting that I couldn't imagine having to do this on and off thing for the next ten days (until my due date).
I got in bed and I was still having them, still ten minutes apart, but they still had the sharp quality to them, mostly where my cesarean scar was. This got me to (over)thinking about whether I was doing the right thing to pursue another vbac. I remembered that I had had the pain over my scar during my first vbac, and this baby was in a similar position so that must be it. I drifted to sleep shortly after 11:30 and dreamed about having contractions until I one woke me up at 1:30.
This Isn't Really It. Or is it?
He started moving around this time again. Which was no surprise- he was always a mover and a shaker and during most of those bouts of contractions, he had been moving. But he was being exceptionally strong this time. And, contractions aside, there was no way that I could sleep through him moving like that. I laid in bed till about 2:00 and then decided I wasn't going to sleep anyways so I might as well get up and do something to distract myself. I turned Ever After on the computer. At about this time, the contractions started to increase in both time and intensity so I decided to time them.
By 2:30 they were about 3 to 5 minutes apart. He was still moving and I started to massage his back forward into a LOA position. I moved my torso in a spiral during contractions, hoping to get him to make that last little turn and put his head in my pelvis like a key into a lock. I was completely not paying attention to the movie now. I also wouldn't allow myself to actually think that this was it- I just didn't want to get my hopes up again. I told myself that if they continued at 3 to 5 minutes apart for an hour, I would wake up Joe and let him know. About ten minutes before that goal, I realized I was starting to need him during contractions so I woke him up. I was having bloody show and was totally in labor, but was still reluctant to call it that.
When I woke him up, I told him to call his Mom (who was going to come stay with the kids) and put her on alert but tell her not to come yet. I had another contraction, felt the baby move down again and told him to scratch that and have her come right now, lol. We called our other support people- my friend Bianca, my sister Michelle and my niece Felicia- and told them to meet us at the hospital. They were coming fast and furious and I was needing Joe to help me through them. Mom got there and we left around 4. I had one in the kitchen right before we left, one halfway down the sidewalk and then one when I got in the car. Luckily, I only had two more in the car and the drive was quick because no one was on the road.
The Hospital
I breathed a sigh of relief as I walked into the hospital, because I had been really concerned about having the baby in the parking garage. Bianca parked the car and we got all the papers signed. Michelle and Felicia arrived right before I got a room. I was so glad to have my women there.
I got kind of a grouchy nurse. She wasn't horrible, she just wasn't particularly pleasant. And when I handed her my birthplan, I could feel her thinking, "oh, one of those women". Which is funny because it didn't include anything crazy or unsafe. I declined a gown and assured her that in the case of an emergency I really didn't care what happened to my clothes. I asked to stand instead of sit for my initial monitoring because sitting was really really uncomfortable at that point.
After the monitors were on, I got really woozy and lightheaded. I sat down on the edge of the bed and the baby's heartrate dropped. I was really out of it and was just trying not to pass out at that point. The resident came in and wanted to check me, which was fine until the nurse started to lower the head of the bed all the way. I looked at her and told her I couldn't lay down and she told me she had to do it so they could check my cervix. I remember thinking, "I have a cervix when I am upright, too." but was feeling too woozy to say anything. I just got up on my elbows so that I could still breathe and that made it so much more comfortable.
Apparently I was about 7 or 8cm dilated at that point and the baby's heartrate was fine once I wasn't sitting. I got onto my knees on the bed and was resting on Joe's shoulder during contractions. They asked to place and saline lock and I gave them the go ahead. I started to feel woozy again and then I fell asleep during a contraction.
I laid there on my left side for a while with the monitor on and Joe talked me through some. Someone said that my Dr. was fine with the initial monitoring that they got and I could been done with it for now (I was doing the monitoring 10 minutes out of the hour). So I took off the belts, the nurses and everyone left the room and it was just Joe and my girls.
Just Laboring
The whole mood changed when everyone left. I just labored and could concentrate on getting him out. I chatted in between contractions for a while. Joe was my main support and Michelle and Bianca rubbed my back some and said encouraging things. He was getting lower and things were intense.

This one makes me laugh. I had gotten cold so I covered up with the blanket. I wanted to rest my head on his shoulder during contractions. When it was over he said something about not being able to breathe because I was covering him with the blanket.
I started to feel woozy again, so I went and knelt on the bed. The bed was upright and I rested my head on it and put the oxygen mask on my face a couple of times. Transition hit. That part of labor where I couldn't really do anything to make the pain better, I just had to get through it. I think I said something like, "This would be the part where I would ask for an epidural". I wasn't asking- just stating a fact. I knew that this meant that it would be over soon anyways and that even if I did ask for one, it would likely be too late.
I just held on for the ride. It hurt more than it did with Adelle and it seemed longer, too. Maybe the water helped a lot with her? It was time to be monitored again so the nurse came in and sat on the bed next to me. He was getting lower and she just kept having to adjust the monitor. I kept saying, "I just don't want to do this anymore". I don't recall saying I couldn't, because I knew I could- I just didn't want to, lol. Joe said all the right things. Toward the end of transition, the contractions started to get less sharp and I knew it would be pushing time soon. I whispered to Joe that it wasn't going to be much longer.
I purposefully didn't want anyone else to know that I was going to push soon because I didn't want that frenzy to happen. The "she's about to push, omg" frenzy. So I kept it to myself as long as possible. I felt the the same burning of tissues at my cervix I felt shortly before Adelle was born. Then in one contraction, I bore down (well, my body did), my water broke and he came down to my perineum- I leaned over and felt his head right there. The nurse (who was still sitting right next to me) said something to the effect of, "oh, we need to get some people in here". He moved back up a bit, which was slightly more comfortable.
I was still facing the wall at this point, but I heard people come in the room. They tried to turn on the light above the bed and I told them to turn it off. Joe reiterated this and they turned it back off. The resident said she wanted to check me before I pushed to make sure there was no cervix left. I told her no, there was no cervix left and not to check me. She was somewhat insistent that there could indeed be cervix left and I could tear it and I said very calmly, "No, don't check me. I can feel his head right at the entrance of my vagina".
My doctor came into the room and she backed off. I had another contraction and I pushed again. It was really weird, I was able to be much more in control of my pushing this time. I panted when I needed to pant and pushed when I needed to push. I reached down to protect myself from tearing. After his head was out, I felt him rotate on the inside and I expected his body to just slide out but I had to push as hard for his chest as his head, because, as it turned out, they were the same circumference. I flipped around the the doctor handed me the baby under my leg.

Pure joy.
The hospital staff was so respectful of this time- I had asked for them to just hand me blankets and to let me wipe him off myself, which they did. They handed me dry blankets as necessary but no one was all up in our space. My doctor and the residents just stood there quietly.




George, Joe and I just had this Moment. Joe reached over and rubbed his cheek and he opened his eyes to the world.

We cut the cord after about ten minutes and I nursed him a few minutes later. The doctor sat on the edge of the bed and waited for the placenta, which it finally did after a position change. They cleaned me up and bit and looked over the baby briefly and then the room cleared out.
We weighed him after a while- 9lbs 4oz. 20in long. Funny, because the US had estimated about 7lbs 12oz just 5 days earlier. He was my biggest baby for gestational age. His blood sugar was fine- apparently I just grow em' big.

Best labor support ever
And that is the story of George's beginning...
What a journey this little boy's pregnancy and birth have been. And, of course, it doesn't really start with him- you can read about Adelle's birth and his other sibling's entrances into this world in this post.
I really wasn't expecting that positive pregnancy test last January. At first, I was worried, not only about the pregnancy part, but also about being mother-of-five. And even though the last few weeks have been rough at times, I think he is fitting nicely into the family. We are going to do just fine as a family of seven.
If you have been keeping up with my blog, you know all about the pregnancy this time- the baby being positive for the little c antigen, the testing, my desperate hope that he would come just a week or two early so that I could know he was ok and so that he wouldn't give the doctors any cause for concern.
I started having sporadic prelabor contractions at about 35 weeks. There were several that were strong enough to make me a teensy bit concerned about my ability to handle the impending labor and birth... they were pretty strong.
Shortly after my 37 week appointment, I started having contractions in the evening that were regular (about 10 minutes apart) but then peter out when I went to bed. He would move a lot during this time, also, so I can only guess that he was just trying to get situated in a good position. In my head, I understood that this was just prodromal labor, but, being an overthinker, I tried not to drive myself crazy about whether this was it or, if it wasn't it, if it would happen soon. I was 3+ cm dilated and 75% effaced at 38 weeks and my OB joked that he probably would see me before my next appointment and I told him I would expect to make it till then and we could just be pleasantly surprised if we saw each other before then. The baby was measuring about 7lbs 12oz at that appointment, according to ultrasound, and my fundus was measuring spot on.
Things Begin.
The Saturday after my appointment, a friend had offered to baby-sit for us so we could go on one last date before the baby came. We took the kids over to her house and headed out to dinner at Panera. It was just lovely- I joked that the baby was waiting to come until the weather cooled off. We walked around some shops- I agreed to walk around the electronics store in exchange for walking around the craft store with Joe. George was so low and big, it was really more of a waddle then a walk. We had to stop by Joe's parents house to get a pan for Labor Day brunch on Monday. While we were there, the cool front finally, finally came through, bringing some rain and much needed relief from the summer of insanely hot temperatures.
We drove back to Mary's house to get the kids, windows rolled down bringing in the cool, rain-scented air. Sweet time.
Got the littles home and put them in bed. Late enough that they didn't even get up after we put them down. We opened the windows, turned on some Norah Jones, sat on the couch and chatted. It was one of the conversations that you can set the stage for but not force. I love those kinds of conversations- I can hardly remember what we said but I remember feeling connected.
Contractions woke me up at 2:30 that Sunday morning- every ten minutes, couldn't sleep through them. I was making noise to get through them and I wanted Joe to sleep, so I went out to the couch, turned on the music I had put together for the birth and did my thing. Then at 6:00 a.m. they just stopped. I was baffled but kind of too tired to care at that point, so I went to sleep for a while. I think I got up around 7:30 and went into the bedroom, where Adelle was sleeping with Joe and I crawled into bed with them for a bit before she woke up. I would have them sporadically, but nothing regular.
We got ready for Church, went to Mass with the kiddos, had a few while we were there, but they weren't real strong. Upon arriving home, as I was getting Adelle out of her carseat, I had a strong one and they picked back up again. Had them regularly during lunch. I needed a nap since I had been up with them for several hours and they petered out while I slept.
It was so beautiful since the cool weather rolled through that after naptime we decided to go to our local nature center and take a walk with the kids. We took a path that I hadn't ever taken before and it ended up leading out to a main road almost 2 miles from our car. It was one of those things that could have made me really grouchy, but choose to laugh through it instead. I had lots of contractions while we were on our walk. Ha! To have been one of the cars on those main roads that afternoon and see the very largely pregnant woman, leaned over her husband, four other children in tow. My poor pelvis felt like it might fall apart when we were in sight of the car. It makes a good part of the story though, right?
We got home and I made dinner for the kids while Joe went and picked up some Chinese food for him and I. By that time, the contractions had gotten stronger and more regular again (about every ten minutes). Joe started timing them when he got back. They increased to about every 6 minutes and I thought that this was it. I called my niece who was coming to the birth and told her to head back to town (she was at the lake for Labor Day weekend). I wanted to get the kids to bed because I was certain they would increase once the kids were.
Only, they didn't. After the kids were in bed, they slowed down to about ten minutes apart again. I tried to use the breast pump to see if they would increase, and they did while I was pumping, but then spaced out again. I took this to mean that it just wasn't time and although I was disappointed, it was getting to be about bedtime and I was tired. I figured that if it wasn't going to happen, at least I should get some rest.
I dreamed about having contractions that night (so I was probably having them and just sleeping through them, I would guess) but slept relatively well. Joe was off of work for Labor Day, so it was great to have him home. As I took a shower that morning, I tried to shake off my disappointment. I thought about this blog post I wrote in March and decided to continue to focus on transformation.
We went to Joe's parents house for a Labor Day brunch. It was a gorgeous day- we sat on their back deck, warm sunshine, cool breeze. Good company, great food. Even though I was disappointed not to have had the baby, it was a really lovely morning. I had contractions on and off throughout the day, but nothing noteworthy.
I got to nap again that afternoon and we had some delicious potato soup for supper. I started having contractions around dinnertime, but I tried to ignore them and pretend I wasn't having them. We got the kids to bed and Joe went out with his brother. I took a bath and watched Glee on the laptop. While I was in the bathtub, I couldn't help but notice that they were about ten minutes apart. But they had an edge to them they didn't have before. I made a mental note of this but chalked it up to overthinking and moved on. I also remember thinking, perhaps a tad overdramatically, that my contractions were never going to be more than ten minutes apart.
Joe got home around ten and I decided to go to bed and left him reading on the couch. I remember standing in the kitchen right before I went and commenting that I couldn't imagine having to do this on and off thing for the next ten days (until my due date).
I got in bed and I was still having them, still ten minutes apart, but they still had the sharp quality to them, mostly where my cesarean scar was. This got me to (over)thinking about whether I was doing the right thing to pursue another vbac. I remembered that I had had the pain over my scar during my first vbac, and this baby was in a similar position so that must be it. I drifted to sleep shortly after 11:30 and dreamed about having contractions until I one woke me up at 1:30.
This Isn't Really It. Or is it?
He started moving around this time again. Which was no surprise- he was always a mover and a shaker and during most of those bouts of contractions, he had been moving. But he was being exceptionally strong this time. And, contractions aside, there was no way that I could sleep through him moving like that. I laid in bed till about 2:00 and then decided I wasn't going to sleep anyways so I might as well get up and do something to distract myself. I turned Ever After on the computer. At about this time, the contractions started to increase in both time and intensity so I decided to time them.
By 2:30 they were about 3 to 5 minutes apart. He was still moving and I started to massage his back forward into a LOA position. I moved my torso in a spiral during contractions, hoping to get him to make that last little turn and put his head in my pelvis like a key into a lock. I was completely not paying attention to the movie now. I also wouldn't allow myself to actually think that this was it- I just didn't want to get my hopes up again. I told myself that if they continued at 3 to 5 minutes apart for an hour, I would wake up Joe and let him know. About ten minutes before that goal, I realized I was starting to need him during contractions so I woke him up. I was having bloody show and was totally in labor, but was still reluctant to call it that.
When I woke him up, I told him to call his Mom (who was going to come stay with the kids) and put her on alert but tell her not to come yet. I had another contraction, felt the baby move down again and told him to scratch that and have her come right now, lol. We called our other support people- my friend Bianca, my sister Michelle and my niece Felicia- and told them to meet us at the hospital. They were coming fast and furious and I was needing Joe to help me through them. Mom got there and we left around 4. I had one in the kitchen right before we left, one halfway down the sidewalk and then one when I got in the car. Luckily, I only had two more in the car and the drive was quick because no one was on the road.
The Hospital
I breathed a sigh of relief as I walked into the hospital, because I had been really concerned about having the baby in the parking garage. Bianca parked the car and we got all the papers signed. Michelle and Felicia arrived right before I got a room. I was so glad to have my women there.
I got kind of a grouchy nurse. She wasn't horrible, she just wasn't particularly pleasant. And when I handed her my birthplan, I could feel her thinking, "oh, one of those women". Which is funny because it didn't include anything crazy or unsafe. I declined a gown and assured her that in the case of an emergency I really didn't care what happened to my clothes. I asked to stand instead of sit for my initial monitoring because sitting was really really uncomfortable at that point.
After the monitors were on, I got really woozy and lightheaded. I sat down on the edge of the bed and the baby's heartrate dropped. I was really out of it and was just trying not to pass out at that point. The resident came in and wanted to check me, which was fine until the nurse started to lower the head of the bed all the way. I looked at her and told her I couldn't lay down and she told me she had to do it so they could check my cervix. I remember thinking, "I have a cervix when I am upright, too." but was feeling too woozy to say anything. I just got up on my elbows so that I could still breathe and that made it so much more comfortable.
Apparently I was about 7 or 8cm dilated at that point and the baby's heartrate was fine once I wasn't sitting. I got onto my knees on the bed and was resting on Joe's shoulder during contractions. They asked to place and saline lock and I gave them the go ahead. I started to feel woozy again and then I fell asleep during a contraction.
Well, not really. I guess I passed out in Joe's arms but I felt like I just fell asleep. They laid me down and gave me oxygen and I came to shortly thereafter. I felt so much better after I passed though- kind of like how you usually feel better right after you throw up? I remember smiling at Joe and telling him I was good now.
I laid there on my left side for a while with the monitor on and Joe talked me through some. Someone said that my Dr. was fine with the initial monitoring that they got and I could been done with it for now (I was doing the monitoring 10 minutes out of the hour). So I took off the belts, the nurses and everyone left the room and it was just Joe and my girls.
Just Laboring
The whole mood changed when everyone left. I just labored and could concentrate on getting him out. I chatted in between contractions for a while. Joe was my main support and Michelle and Bianca rubbed my back some and said encouraging things. He was getting lower and things were intense.

This one makes me laugh. I had gotten cold so I covered up with the blanket. I wanted to rest my head on his shoulder during contractions. When it was over he said something about not being able to breathe because I was covering him with the blanket.I started to feel woozy again, so I went and knelt on the bed. The bed was upright and I rested my head on it and put the oxygen mask on my face a couple of times. Transition hit. That part of labor where I couldn't really do anything to make the pain better, I just had to get through it. I think I said something like, "This would be the part where I would ask for an epidural". I wasn't asking- just stating a fact. I knew that this meant that it would be over soon anyways and that even if I did ask for one, it would likely be too late.
I just held on for the ride. It hurt more than it did with Adelle and it seemed longer, too. Maybe the water helped a lot with her? It was time to be monitored again so the nurse came in and sat on the bed next to me. He was getting lower and she just kept having to adjust the monitor. I kept saying, "I just don't want to do this anymore". I don't recall saying I couldn't, because I knew I could- I just didn't want to, lol. Joe said all the right things. Toward the end of transition, the contractions started to get less sharp and I knew it would be pushing time soon. I whispered to Joe that it wasn't going to be much longer.
I purposefully didn't want anyone else to know that I was going to push soon because I didn't want that frenzy to happen. The "she's about to push, omg" frenzy. So I kept it to myself as long as possible. I felt the the same burning of tissues at my cervix I felt shortly before Adelle was born. Then in one contraction, I bore down (well, my body did), my water broke and he came down to my perineum- I leaned over and felt his head right there. The nurse (who was still sitting right next to me) said something to the effect of, "oh, we need to get some people in here". He moved back up a bit, which was slightly more comfortable.
I was still facing the wall at this point, but I heard people come in the room. They tried to turn on the light above the bed and I told them to turn it off. Joe reiterated this and they turned it back off. The resident said she wanted to check me before I pushed to make sure there was no cervix left. I told her no, there was no cervix left and not to check me. She was somewhat insistent that there could indeed be cervix left and I could tear it and I said very calmly, "No, don't check me. I can feel his head right at the entrance of my vagina".
My doctor came into the room and she backed off. I had another contraction and I pushed again. It was really weird, I was able to be much more in control of my pushing this time. I panted when I needed to pant and pushed when I needed to push. I reached down to protect myself from tearing. After his head was out, I felt him rotate on the inside and I expected his body to just slide out but I had to push as hard for his chest as his head, because, as it turned out, they were the same circumference. I flipped around the the doctor handed me the baby under my leg.

Pure joy.
The hospital staff was so respectful of this time- I had asked for them to just hand me blankets and to let me wipe him off myself, which they did. They handed me dry blankets as necessary but no one was all up in our space. My doctor and the residents just stood there quietly.




George, Joe and I just had this Moment. Joe reached over and rubbed his cheek and he opened his eyes to the world.
We cut the cord after about ten minutes and I nursed him a few minutes later. The doctor sat on the edge of the bed and waited for the placenta, which it finally did after a position change. They cleaned me up and bit and looked over the baby briefly and then the room cleared out.
We weighed him after a while- 9lbs 4oz. 20in long. Funny, because the US had estimated about 7lbs 12oz just 5 days earlier. He was my biggest baby for gestational age. His blood sugar was fine- apparently I just grow em' big.
Best labor support ever
He didn't have any issues with his immediate transition, which is what I had been most concerned about. His Apgars were 9/9 and his hemoglobin count was fine shortly after birth. He was jaundice and spent 9 days on the biliblanket at home, but no issues other than that. He is an excellent nurser. What a beautiful little addition to our family.
And that is the story of George's beginning...
Friday, September 16, 2011
Friday, September 2, 2011
38 weeks- I can be patient
I was reading this post from when I was about 39 weeks pregnant with Adelle and suspect I might need to revisit it from time to time in the upcoming weeks.
Of course, things are a little different now. I had the luxury of not really having outside pressure as to when she would be born then. She was fine all snuggled in there, no concerns about antibodies. Any impatience on my part was just that- mine.
I had my appointment yesterday and the baby was looking well. But both of my doctors asked if I wanted to schedule my delivery at 39 weeks. It was mentioned pretty casually, no pressure at this point. I get it- that is their job, get the baby out before any problems arise. And he has done so beautifully up to this point. Why risk it?
I politely declined, and they seemed to understand. I still let it bounce around in my head though, because that is what I do. Benefits of going into labor on my own: not as painful (I suppose- as a general rule, spontaneous labor is less painful), the freedom to do what I need to do in early labor, the chance for the baby to get to initiate labor and knowing he is really ready to be born. Risks: we know that he seems to be doing fine right now, but that won't necessarily be the case in a week. Or two.
But the perinatologist has reassured me several times, that at this point, the risks of him becoming anemic are fairly low. His MCAs have been very good- really not even close to being in the anemic range. So what is another week? Or two?
The bonus in this situation is, should we decide to induce for whatever reason, my Bishop's score is fairly high, so it would likely not be the long, arduous scenario that Liam's induction was. Also, I have been having a fair amount of "real" contractions sporadically for the last week, so if I could get them to get close together and regular, labor might not be too far off, right? Right? (I am trying not to put too much hope in this situation because I know you can have on and off labor for weeks).
I feel fine with the decision to wait right now. But as the weeks tick by, I am afraid that the pressure (internal and external) will become greater. I am not too keen on him being in there with the antibodies, either. So, I guess at this point, I am hoping that he will come on his own sooner rather than later and save me the internal conflict. But until then, I just have to be patient and take it one day at a time.
Of course, things are a little different now. I had the luxury of not really having outside pressure as to when she would be born then. She was fine all snuggled in there, no concerns about antibodies. Any impatience on my part was just that- mine.
I had my appointment yesterday and the baby was looking well. But both of my doctors asked if I wanted to schedule my delivery at 39 weeks. It was mentioned pretty casually, no pressure at this point. I get it- that is their job, get the baby out before any problems arise. And he has done so beautifully up to this point. Why risk it?
I politely declined, and they seemed to understand. I still let it bounce around in my head though, because that is what I do. Benefits of going into labor on my own: not as painful (I suppose- as a general rule, spontaneous labor is less painful), the freedom to do what I need to do in early labor, the chance for the baby to get to initiate labor and knowing he is really ready to be born. Risks: we know that he seems to be doing fine right now, but that won't necessarily be the case in a week. Or two.
But the perinatologist has reassured me several times, that at this point, the risks of him becoming anemic are fairly low. His MCAs have been very good- really not even close to being in the anemic range. So what is another week? Or two?
The bonus in this situation is, should we decide to induce for whatever reason, my Bishop's score is fairly high, so it would likely not be the long, arduous scenario that Liam's induction was. Also, I have been having a fair amount of "real" contractions sporadically for the last week, so if I could get them to get close together and regular, labor might not be too far off, right? Right? (I am trying not to put too much hope in this situation because I know you can have on and off labor for weeks).
I feel fine with the decision to wait right now. But as the weeks tick by, I am afraid that the pressure (internal and external) will become greater. I am not too keen on him being in there with the antibodies, either. So, I guess at this point, I am hoping that he will come on his own sooner rather than later and save me the internal conflict. But until then, I just have to be patient and take it one day at a time.
Monday, August 29, 2011
The rest of the summer...
For whatever reason, blogger will only upload one picture at a time, which is tedious, but I am glad I at least figured it out :) Here what is what we have been up to this summer besides doctor's appointments.
My sisters and brothers- in-law, Joe and my Dad have been working on my Dad's house to get it all cleaned out to sell sometime in the not so distant future. Since I am largely pregnant, I got to watch after the little ones. My four + five nieces and nephews = loud times. Although I should say that my niece Teresa, who was eleven (now twelve!) was really one of the watchers more than a watchee.
The boys played out in the pool and then gathered around the computer to watch each other take turns playing Angry Birds. Even Zane watched part of the time.
The girls taking their turn in the pool.
There has also been some nesting this summer. Among my bigger projects was decluttering the kitchen. This was a few weeks ago and it still isn't too bad.
The surface at the forefront of this picture is usually covered in papers and toys and various assorted things I put there to keep out of the reach of children.
Junk and bill drawers conquered.
And, since it has been nearly the hottest summer in recorded Kansas history (we might just get there yet!), there was a fair amount of swimming.
Getting in on the nesting. They actually really like to wash windows, who am I to quash that kind of enthusiasm?
Even a little bit of knitting for my girl. I started this soaker in January. Yes, January. She uses the potty on occasion but I am not really going to even attempt potty training her until after my boy is born and the dust settles so I figured she could get a few good months out of it!
Issy and Adelle spiffing up my nephew Robert's old tricycle which we found in the shed at my Dad's. Now Delle has her own trike!
My sisters and brothers- in-law, Joe and my Dad have been working on my Dad's house to get it all cleaned out to sell sometime in the not so distant future. Since I am largely pregnant, I got to watch after the little ones. My four + five nieces and nephews = loud times. Although I should say that my niece Teresa, who was eleven (now twelve!) was really one of the watchers more than a watchee.
The boys played out in the pool and then gathered around the computer to watch each other take turns playing Angry Birds. Even Zane watched part of the time.
The girls taking their turn in the pool.
There has also been some nesting this summer. Among my bigger projects was decluttering the kitchen. This was a few weeks ago and it still isn't too bad.
The surface at the forefront of this picture is usually covered in papers and toys and various assorted things I put there to keep out of the reach of children.
Junk and bill drawers conquered.
And, since it has been nearly the hottest summer in recorded Kansas history (we might just get there yet!), there was a fair amount of swimming.
Getting in on the nesting. They actually really like to wash windows, who am I to quash that kind of enthusiasm?
Even a little bit of knitting for my girl. I started this soaker in January. Yes, January. She uses the potty on occasion but I am not really going to even attempt potty training her until after my boy is born and the dust settles so I figured she could get a few good months out of it!
Issy and Adelle spiffing up my nephew Robert's old tricycle which we found in the shed at my Dad's. Now Delle has her own trike!
This summer of appointments and excitement and busyness has showed me how much of a homebody I really am. It has been good, but I am dreaming of the upcoming autumn days, cooler weather, slower pace, school starting and snuggling my little new guy.
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