Happy birthday to my sweet little girl

8 years. Where has 8 years gone? When did she get to be such a big girl?

Thanks for the relatively easy introduction to motherhood, Sweet Pea.

It's a boy....

Well, maybe not. But I think it is.

We were thinking about waiting to find out. If the baby was Kell negative and I didn't have to have a gazillion ultrasounds, we were going to wait until he or she was born. Now I guess we will need the baby to be Kell *and* little C negative in order to have a low-risk pregnancy, so it seems less likely. I just don't think I could have weekly US and not find out.

But I am telling you now-it is a boy. I have "popped" even though I really haven't gained weight, no acne. I suppose we will see :)

Wow. Life is a wild ride.

Recent pic of Adelle- I was playing with Joe's camera

I am having a hard time starting this. Life has taken a very unexpected turn in the last couple of months. The holidays were good- for Christmas, we hosted Joe's family one day and my family the next. We spent NYE together as a family- went out to eat, had Family Movie Night and tucked the littles in bed well before midnight.

I made a rather ambitious plan at the beginning of January to get a bunch of my AAMI assignments done before the end of February. Well, you know what they say about the best laid plans...

On the 7th, I found out I was pregnant with our fifth baby. Wow. Five. I spent most of January and February feeling rather nauseated and exhausted (that first trimester fatigue is powerful stuff- I had remembered it intellectually, but it was even more compelling than I remembered) and trying to integrate the idea of another baby. I am sure it'll all work out, but most days I am not sure how.

The kids are extremely excited about the baby, whose womb name is "Poppy". I had my first doctor's appointment last week. Heartbeat in the 160s, my fundus is where it belongs. Weirdly, I have thought I felt the baby move a couple or three times in the last week, but it would be pretty early (I am twelve weeks).

Unfortunately, I got my bloodwork back yesterday and it appears that now we are not only dealing anti-kell but also anti- little c. I am still in the "self-pity, why me?" stage, so you'll have to excuse me. Why? Why do other women get to have low-risk, get pregnant, pop-em-out pregnancies and mine are such ordeals? Why doesn't my body like my husband's babies? It is just frustrating. I am sure there is some life lesson in here about learning to trust, surrender and blah blah blah. I am not there yet. I am still holding out for a false positive for the anti-little c. I go to the perinatologist on the 28th, so we'll see. Sigh.

Other than those life changing events, life is okay ;) Now that first- trimester haze is waning, we are getting back into more exciting school things (we were strictly reading, writing, arithmetic for a few weeks there- just the basics). Issy and Isaac are doing great- Issy is reading like a little maniac and I can hardly keep up with her! Isaac, too.

Liam has been, erm, challenging at times. Issy and Isaac went through a stage at around 4 1/2 too, so it wasn't entirely unexpected, but given his personality, his manifests a little different. Rage, specifically. Which I find a little hard to deal with at times. There are things that help, but I am hoping the whole thing just passes soon. He is such a sweet, enthusiastic little boy when he isn't being so defiant.

Oh, Adelle. She is amazing. She talks so much, I love it. She says, "Mama, I wud joo" when I put her to bed at night. She is also completely exhausting. We have been going through some sleep issues with her lately and it is driving me crazy. I despair that it won't get better before Poppy arrives, though I am sure it will.

So mostly the word that defines life now is "overwhelming". Sometimes in a good way, sometimes in a bad way, sometimes in a neutral way. At least life is never dull, right?

Beauty

We've missed snow. It turns winter browns into beautiful, cool white. My children don't particularly like to play outside when it is cold and blustery and not snowing. Throw in a little snow and ta- da! They actually want to get outside, roll around. Sure it is messy, cold and a pain to drive in. But yes, snow gets a thumbs up in my book. (except for snow past mid- March. If you didn't get it in during winter, Mother Nature, it's too late.)

Let's try this again

Delle being initiated at her first Spa Night.

I keep starting posts and then abandoning them. So while there are a ton of pictures I could post from the last month and a half, I thought I would start with this one. Have to start somewhere, right?

Life has been pretty good. It was a really good Advent, not too much, not too little. Just preparations. Holidays were nice- we hosted both our families on separate days, so there was some cleaning involved, but it was nice to not have to drive around.

I was feeling like I was starting to get drug under by the winter blahs, so I have been trying to turn it around. I have recommitted myself to my AAMI work so that I can get my Orientation finished before the end of February. Then I can really dig into the meat of it. This has helped with the blahs, fortunately. January and February (and August) are kind of my least favorite months, so anything to help them pass by more smoothly would be great.

We started back to our core things last week and will be continuing the Alphabet Path tomorrow, which everyone is pretty excited about. I am looking into using the Mater Amabilis curriculum next year. Just exploring it right now, seeing if it'll be a good fit for us. Issy will be in 3rd grade, Isaac in 1st and Liam in Kindergarten (which totally weirds me out- I can't believe he is going to be in Kindergarten!).

So that is us. We are just hanging on tight, hoping to get into a good rhythm and get through the grey winter months. I will try to get some more pictures up soon :)

Um, hi.

I am alive. And I have really cute pictures of the kids. I even started a post a couple of weeks ago about all the things that we have been/ will be doing this Advent.

This is not that post, though.

Things are fine, really, just busy with Advent preparations. Better update soon.

Things go smoothly in my head...

I decided Thursday morning to take the kids to daily Mass at our new parish. It is something I have been meaning to do for a while. Years actually. When I was in college, there was a chapel in the basement of my dorm and I loved having Jesus there, available all the time. Daily mass at 9 every evening. So since I started having children, it has been a goal of mine to make it to at least one weekday Mass.

Well, for a while there, the prospect of taking 1 (or 2 or 3 or 4) small children to Mass by myself seemed a little daunting. But since we moved back and Adelle has gotten older (and Liam has gotten better during Mass) I figured I could handle it. No problem actually. I mean, daily Mass lasts about half an hour, how rough could it be? And at our new parish, it starts at 8:30 instead of 8, giving me the extra half hour to round up my little peeps.

So I did it. And in an honest assessment, it really wasn't too bad. Issy was great. Isaac was spacey and hummed a lot (he drives me crazy with this- he seems to have the inability to be completely silent with his mouth. there is always some sort of noise emitted from it. I give him a stern look, he looks contrite and then about 10 seconds later, the noise starts again. never terribly loud, but loud enough to be noticeable.)

And Liam. Well, he wasn't misbehaving, persay. There was just a lot of trying to snuggle with me. Which is fine when I am sitting on the couch reading a book to him, not so much when I am holding a squirmy toddler and giving Isaac stern looks for making mouth noise.

Adelle was a 17 month old that wants to get down and run around and was unhappy when I didn't allow that. And then Liam kept touching her to, in his words, "make her happy" but really it was making her shriek, "no no no no!"

Fun times.

All this left me feeling a little bit flustered. If it was just us, or a group of other families with small kids, their age-appropriate but not obnoxious behavior wouldn't bother me. But as it was, we were sitting with a lot of older folks, who I have found may or may not very forgiving of this kind of behavior. I always assume they aren't, though and this leaves me feeling self conscious and a bit like a bad parent.

So at about the first reading, I was seriously reconsidering my decision to come and was thinking that maybe I wouldn't try daily Mass again for a couple of years.

At communion time, I took a deep breath, stepped out of the pew, begged for the grace to get through the next few minutes and walked up with my crew (Delle in my arms and Liam whacking each pew on the walk to the front of church, despite my feeble efforts to discretely get him to stop).

And I got to receive Him, which is always a good thing.

We went back to the pew to pray and Mass was over. There had been two older ladies behind me and as I was walking out of the pew, they stopped me to tell me what beautiful children I have.

They thanked me for bringing the kids to Mass.

I told them, honestly, that I had been thinking that maybe it hadn't been a good idea and they told me that they weren't bothered at all and yes, please bring them back.

So we will go to daily Mass again and I will remember that no matter what happens, I am taking my babies to see Him. And I get to receive Him.

Which is always a good thing.

Life is pretty great right now

When we moved back here, and especially last January/February/March, I was concerned that Kansas would never feel like home again. I was so homesick for the mountains, Idaho specifically. Spring and Summer were better.

And then God gave me this Autumn to soothe my soul. Led us to live in a beautiful house with huge windows and gorgeous, leafy trees. Nature walks with the kids complete with gathering acorns like their very lives depended on it (maybe my kids are actually squirrels?). A husband that gets to come home for lunch most days- a beautiful break in our sometimes hectic days. My only complaint being my grouchy, teething toddler. Poor little Delle the Grouch. But she is so cute, most of the time it makes up for the grouchy. And I think the teething is subsiding some (for now, at least).

I feel like I have finally gotten the hang of homeschooling. Love it. Love to see them learning. Building community with each other, taking care of one another. The creativity. Joy.

I am so grateful. I still miss the mountains. So much, but at least it doesn't ache now. I hope to get to live in the mountains again. But I can be alright until then. Good even.

The following pictures are what happens when you allow kids to take the camera outside on a beautiful fall day:

Worm!

Mom (with leaves)

She is just so pretty, I can't get enough of her.

I asked Issy to get Adelle out an outfit when she picked out her own clothes. Not only did she pick out outfits, but then she posed them. Adelle's clothes are holding her Lamby, and Issy's are holding her bear, brushing her hair and wearing a headband. I love her, how precious.

Halloween

Pumpkin decorating. To me, pumpkins + paint + one-year-olds don't mix, so me and the Delle hung out while the older kids painted.

Ise concentrating very hard.

The cap on that glitter glue gave him some trouble.

Issy being theatrical with her pumpkin painting.

Cute P-p-p-piglet.

Marney cousins. About half of the participants of this picture were not feeling very enthusiastic about it.

Sullivan cousins young enough to dress up.

Dragon, Glinda the Good Witch, Piglet and Thomas. Awesome.

Apparently in toddler-speak...

The simple word "up" means:

1. pick me up
2. I would like to nurse (now!)
3. give me some of that food that you are serving the other kids

Good morning, little one

Adelle has been scary lately. My sweet little peanut was replaced by a cranky, opinionated toddler whose favorite word is no (not just a demure little no, either. We are talking the sassiest, loudest NO! that a 16-month-old can muster). She is in a good mood sometimes, but you can't count on it. It has been challenging, for sure.

This morning, she had woken up to nurse at 6:15 and then apparently Issy stirred and woke her up again at 6:45. I laid down in Issy's bed to nurse her again and snuggled her close to me. She started out a bit restless, but as she nursed, the good hormones worked their magic on us- she stopped fiddling, I could feel her breathing even, her little tummy rising rhythmically against mine. And I was filled with love and gratitude for her. She is a challenge at times, but so wonderful. So beautiful. Learning, imitating, growing. I am thankful for those peaceful moments, wrapped up in blankets and warm milk and love.

Pumpkin Patch 2010

The homeschooling group we belong to had a group get together at the pumpkin patch and we got to go earlier this week. The patch we went to had a lot of fun things to do- a zipline, bouncy mat, tricycle track, playground, big slides. And there was a great selection of pumpkins in their "school" patch. It was a lot of fun!

Adelle says, "Hmmm, which pumpkin should I choose?"

Zipline

Adelle was not feeling very cooperative with the group picture effort. In fairness, it was almost naptime for her.

Silly boys

Backyard

One gorgeous fall morning.

Isaac- the party

He wanted a chocolate cake with strawberry icing. And Thomas. This was the craftiest concoction I could come up with that met all the specification. He was a happy boy :)

Lots of fun stuff. Can't believe what a big boy he is getting to be!

Fall is here

Finally! We were able to go to a great little nature area a couple of times last week- once with my sister and her kiddos and once with a friend. It was so gorgeous. The leaves are starting to change, the weather was beautiful. Love it.

Jude and Isaac are best friends.

Big grasshopper!

There were several logs that had turtles lined up on them.

That is one big spider :)

Sweet Isaac is 6

Six years ago today I gave birth to my first son. His pregnancy was a challenge and a blessing. His birth and first few days were likewise.

My firstborn son is sweet, sensitive and beautiful. What a wonderful little boy.

First kisses

Little bluelight special. Later, we thought he looked like he needed a snuggle so we took turns holding him and sitting under the lights.

Settling in. Again.

Life is pretty beautiful here. I really like the new house. This is the view out my back windows:

It is like a little oasis in the middle of the busy East side. Joe has been coming home for lunch- we love getting to see him in the middle of the day for a little bit. I am really grateful that he no longer has to spend an hour getting to and from work.

The bedrooms are unpacked and decorated. We have moved so much in the last few years that I really want the kids to feel like that is something that is theirs no matter where we live.

Joe is on TEC this weekend, which is a little stressful, but life will die down a bit when he gets back. Finish organizing here and settling in.

But so far, I love it here. Love. I think this might be a really good fit for us. It is nice to feel at home.

There we go.

All moved. Unpacking at the new house and cleaning up the old house. Wondering when the newness will wear off and the kids will stop running around like I fed them each a pound of sugar?

Other than that, we are fine :) Looking forward to being settled and starting school again!